An Untitled Mess

Okay, been a few days, been super busy.  Gave my shift up at work on Saturday night so I could spend the day out at the farm working with my dad.  We got a lot done and it was good to spend time with him and my mom out there.  Highlight of the day...catching two snakes, finding a nest full of baby mice, and feeding the mice to the snakes.  OMG, call PETA!  So we drop the first little mouse in with the snake, I start live streaming to Facebook and...nothing.  The snake doesn't even look like he's interested in this tasty little snack.  I'm crestfallen.  We come back about 15 minutes later and the mouse is gone.  Ah man, I missed it!  So dad puts another one in there and the same thing...nothing.  But when we come back, he's gone.  So we drop a third one in there and he attacks the little booger instantly.  Of course, I didn't have my phone out because I'm super lame.  So I missed the coolest live stream of the centur...

Super shout-out to The 252 Rocks.  You can find them on Facebook (I'm a member).  People paint these stones and then hide them all over the county.  When you find one, you relocate it, but not without taking a picture of it first of course.  It's pretty neat seeing how enthusiastic people are about not only finding these things but also painting them.  I found this rock just sitting amongst the Halloween stuff at Lowe's today.  I didn't move it but I did take a picture.  This has become a miniature phenomenon around here and it's pretty fun to just stumble across these things. A rather busy day for me today.  Met Di-Di at the gym this morning for a quick little workout.  I was surprised at how sore I actually was from my solo workout yesterday.  That's a good sign.  I shot home and decided to do some cleaning up for mom.  It kinda backfired because she got back from the farm kind of early and it was not as big of a surprise ...

Surprised?  Well, you shouldn't be.  I have not been happy for some time now...well, many years that is.  I've had my moments of happiness.  Short, wonderful bursts that crash into my heart and overwhelm me with love and contentment.  But those were temporary, like everything in this world is.  Those moments were quickly replaced with pain and hurt.  Shattered, sadly, by the ones that were the source of that fleeting happiness. I'm coming up on a big anniversary...in exactly 16 days.  The feelings I have are mixed.  Everyone that knows what that day means will expect me to be, and encourage me to be, happy.  But some days, most days, I feel worse than I did a year ago.  I want to be happy so that everyone else will be happy that I'm happy.  Wait...Who's on first?  As this day approaches, I know that I won't be anywhere close to happy.  There were a few days last week where I almost gave up...gave up on everything....