Sick As A Dog

So, Wednesday night I woke up just hurting.  I didn't want to believe that it was anything more than something a few Tums could handle.  Typical guy thinking there.  Two hours after chewing on a few Tums, I wake up again, this time feeling way worse.  So I did what any sensible guy would do...I made myself throw up.  That's right, the 'ole finger down the throat trick.  Well, I wasn't ready for what happened next.  Everything from dinner starting coming back up.  Everything.  And not the easy way, oh no, it had to start coming out of my nose too.  I heaved for a good five minutes and for a second wondered if what I had just done was actually a good idea.  When it finally subsided, my stomach felt better but my body felt like crap.  Oh, and I had ran four miles right before dinner too so that didn't help matters.  When I thought I was in the clear, the unthinkable happened.  I pooped my pants.  That's right, I'm man enough to admit it.  Thankfully I was still in the bathroom...the shorts went into the trash.

So, I woke up Thursday morning feeling like death.  I mustered up enough courage to get in my car and drive across to Food Lion to get some Pepto Bismol and ginger ale.  The cashier actually asked me how I was doing.  I looked at her, looked at the bottle of glorious pink ooze, and said, "I'm hoping things will get better."  I think it hit her that she had asked a stupid question.  Come on, I'm buying Pepto and ginger ale...I know you scan food at a grocery store but it doesn't take a rocket surgeon to figure out I'm having a bad morning.  My sunglasses are still on my face, I look like death!  I spent all day in my bed, not eating anything, chugging Pepto and sipping ginger ale.  Ahhh, the sweet life.

Friday, I was suppose to go into work at noon.  I woke up thinking, "Hey, I think I can do this.  Yeah, I only feel bad because I have not eaten in 36 hours.  I just need lunch then I'm good to go."  So on my way out the door, I stop by Bojangles.  I admit, maybe not the best choice for a post-stomach virus celebration feast but I had a hankering.  I got down the four chicken tenders and a few fries.  By time I clocked in at work and that greasy goodness hit my stomach, it was game over.  My boss was like, "Are you okay?  If you don't feel well you should go home, we'll be okay without you tonight."  That's all you had to say.  I clocked out and hit my bed as soon as I got home.  By evening, I was feeling a bit better so I went for a walk.  Dad and I watched a few episodes of The Walking Dead later that night.  I've gotta say, not very impressed by Season Seven.  Oh well.

Today, Saturday, I was feeling back to normal.  I went to the flea market and found me a desk chair and some really cute hair bows
that I gave to Amber to give to Oinkers.  A local lady makes them and if she had a website I would post a link.  Her name is Susan Sides and she said she had a Facebook page.  I had a Sub Way lunch with dad and mom out at the farm while they were in between tours and then I went in to work this evening.  A girl asked me for my number :-)  I hope I don't regret giving it to her, she could be trouble.